Mommy Muslimah

There is nothing like a proper family breakfast. Since the weekdays are usually so hectic, this can only happen on the weekends. But a big breakfast for the whole family usually means a lot of work. Growing up, I always saw my mom in the kitchen cooking and serving. Most of the time she never even joined us for the “family” breakfast. When I got older and was able to help out, I would. And then after everyone else had eaten, the two of us would eat while the rest of the family was already deep into their conversations.

I love the feel of a lazy morning with a big breakfast followed by conversation that starts at the breakfast table and ends on the sofa with a cup of tea. But now in the same position as my mom was years ago, I realized it’s not as fun as it looks. I found myself, similar to my mother, hanging out mostly in the kitchen, serving the hot paratha, waffle or pancake, followed by a kitchen cleanup and then finally the table (because by then everyone is done and on to other things). But to my surprise, it wasn’t as fun for the hubby either, he was stuck serving the kids and feeding the baby among all the other chaos of a kids table.

Things had to change, and they had to change fast before it became the norm as it was for generations before. My husband can hold his own in the kitchen and the kids have always seen that.

Side note: I had a well meaning Auntie (the Indian/Pakistani term for any random elderly lady) tell me that the man should NOT be in the kitchen. Thankfully my husband was close by and very respectfully explained to her that it is in fact a sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) to be helpful… even in the kitchen.

Anyway, it wasn’t hard to get the kids involved in the kitchen. They were eager to learn to cook. Especially, the foods they were going to eat. We’ve always had the kids involved in the kitchen but away from the hot stove and oven. For most people the idea of a hot anything around kids is extremely terrifying, and as parents, we were no exceptions. But, we had to figure out a way to safely introduce the kids to the stove.

First, we had long discussions on the what’s and how’s of stove safety both amongst ourselves and with the kids. We told them that we would like for them to be more involved in the kitchen. This would allow them to learn to cook and, in case they ever needed it, they would be able to make food for themselves. It would also be mean that if we all made breakfast together, we could then enjoy eating together. Its important that children understand that they have a place in their home and that they have the ability to contribute to the family.

Some of the important safety rules and concerns we discussed were:

• The importance of being fully focused on the task at hand.
• • The stove and everything that goes on top is hot, it is extremely important to be fully focused on the stove.
• The importance of holding the pan handle when stirring so that the hot pan does not fall and harm them or others that may be in the kitchen.
• The importance of turning the pan handle towards its side so that it is out of the way and doesn’t accidentally get knocked over by someone.
• And most importantly we discussed that different ingredients have different reactions when put inside a hot pot or pan.
• • For example, the reaction of oil and water when they meet over the stove. Because oil will splatter if met with water over a stove, and the hot droplets can burn on contact, it is important to make sure the pan (and the hands handling it) completely dry before adding oil to a hot pan.

Then, we found a pair of extra small oven mitts on amazon and taught the kids how to safely hold the pan handle and the spatula or wooden spoon oven a hot stove. (They only wore the gloves during the first few months. Later, we realized, that the gloves were a bigger hazard since the kids were not able to properly grasp the handles and spatulas).

I first started with my eldest daughter, teaching her how to heat a frozen paratha (Indian flat bread) over the stove. By doing this, she learned how to handle a hot pan, Then, she learned to pour pancake batter onto a hot pan and eventually be able to turn the pancake and remove it from the pan on to a plate. When she was comfortable with both tasks, she moved on to carefully pouring her eggs (which were already cracking into a bowl) onto the hot pan. This was probably the most scariest for her as well as us since it involved hot oil (in a small quantity, but still hot oil). Since my daughter loves sunny side up (eggs), she also had to learn how to handle the hot oil and the best way to cook the tops of her eggs, and eventually how to carefully put the cooked eggs on to her plate.

Though the journey actually started much younger, my daughter officially began cooking on the stove a little over two years ago. A year and a half ago when I was expecting our fourth baby, I had those days when getting up from bed was nearly impossible. In those days, my then 7 year old, would cook macaroni and cheese (under her father’s supervision of course) for not only herself and her siblings but also for me. It was the sweetest gesture, she would bring it up in a tray with a bottle of water and some sort of dessert ❤️.

We are still slowly working to add more recipes into their cooking experience. But for now, the older two kids are comfortable enough in the kitchen to lend a helping hand. My second daughter, who is 6 years old, has just started her cooking journey. So far, she has only been able to pour her egg on to the hot pan. But, we’re working on getting her quickly caught up to her older siblings.